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Elizabeth Warren has laid out her 11 Commandments of Progressivism. I agree with EPJ’s overall take on her points;

“The short version is this: ‘The government should force others to give me what I consider politically correct to have and also force their behavior in general based on my politically correct views'”

I’ll give my breakdown below:

1) – “We believe that Wall Street needs stronger rules and tougher enforcement, and we’re willing to fight for it.”

We believe in the status quo, but realize that many people are coming to resent the way we politicians have raped the taxpayers to pay off the bankers. We realize that many people are coming to understand the folly of the central banks and their cartels and the way the fed pumps cash into the system as a means of enriching themselves while inflating the money supply, thus draining the savings of those hardworking American’s I claim to represent and making their groceries, utilities, and rent/mortgages that much more expensive.

2) – “We believe in science, and that means that we have a responsibility to protect this Earth.”

We believe that basing our judgements on observable and recordable data is stupid and that when it comes to matters of science we should go with our feelings. Therefore we plan to continue with Obama’s environmental policy of letting special interests create said policy. We will destroy the coal industry, the natural gas industry, the petroleum industry, putting hundreds of thousands of American’s out of work while pretending that solar and wind can power the country, all while raising American’s energy bills across the board. We will do this while taking cash from the environmental lobby while claiming it’s only the Republicans who take bribes.

3) – “We believe that the Internet shouldn’t be rigged to benefit big corporations, and that means real net neutrality.”

We believe that freedom of speech exists only if you agree with what we believe and if you don’t, well fuck off. We plan to make it illegal to question our ideas, especially when you confront us with facts.

4) – “We believe that no one should work full-time and still live in poverty, and that means raising the minimum wage.”

We believe that pandering to the emotions of unskilled labor is more effective at winning elections than a basic understanding of economics. Besides, Paul Krugman agrees with us and he’s really smart.

5) “We believe that fast-food workers deserve a livable wage, and that means that when they take to the picket line, we are proud to fight alongside them.

See number 4. And while we say we’re proud to fight alongside them we say that knowing their jobs could be replaced by technology in a very short amount of time, should they decide to take to the picket line. However, their jobs aren’t as important as our righteousness indignation.

6) – “We believe that students are entitled to get an education without being crushed by debt.”

We believe that your neighbors should be forced to pay for your shitty liberal arts degree.

7) – “We believe that after a lifetime of work, people are entitled to retire with dignity, and that means protecting Social Security, Medicare, and pensions.”

We believe that SCOTUS has already ruled your Social Security doesn’t really belong to you and we will spend it how we choose. For the time being, the younger, employed people will continue to pay for the retirement and medial needs of the spoiled ass baby boomers. When it becomes PC to keep your SS check and spend it on something else, we will do so.

8) – “We believe—I can’t believe I have to say this in 2014—we believe in equal pay for equal work.”

See number 2. We believe it is politcally correct to speak of such horrid inequality despite the fact there really isn’t any because we believe in special treatment for women and minorities at the expense of white, heterosexual males.

9) – “We believe that equal means equal, and that’s true in marriage, it’s true in the workplace, it’s true in all of America.”

See number 3. We believe in equality so long as you believe in the same thing we do. If you should hold any opposing viewpoint you’re a racist, misogynist, homophobe and plain ol’ poopy head.

10) – “We believe that immigration has made this country strong and vibrant, and that means reform.”

We believe that ‘reform’ means amnesty and that granting amnesty will generate another generation of Democrat voters. Especially when we promise to give them all the welfare benefits and other free shit, stolen from productive working American’s.

11) – “And we believe that corporations are not people, that women have a right to their bodies. We will overturnHobby Lobby and we will fight for it. We will fight for it!”

We believe that freedom of association is an abhorrent, racist, inhuman function. Every person should be forced to interact with whomever we, your government tell you to interact with. We believe that neither the employer or prospective employee have a right to negotiate the terms of said employment. We believe in a one-size-fits-all concept and have no intention of allowing people to decide for themselves the course of their own lives. But mostly, we do not believe that people should have any bit of liberty not given to them by the state that can be taken away like a drivers license for any or no reason. We will work diligently to transform America into a wonderful workers paradise like the former USSR. We’ve already got the police state.

She might just beat the old warmongering cunt Hillary. Good thing I’m planning to leave the US.

Hoogly

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